A Right of Passage!
While on an amazing hike today with my three children, my best friend Katherine, and her two daughters, we had a really great conversation about our daughters and what it will be like for them when they begin to grow from a child and into a woman. In other cultures it has been a long standing tradition to have a very clear right of passage. When a girl gets her period it is considered a very special and sacred time. In fact in certain indigenous tribes, when a woman gets her period she goes to a special part of the village to be only with other women, during that time. She will rest and take care of herself because it is a sacred cycle of her body.
Both Katherine and I agree that we must be open and talk freely about the changes our daughters are going through. If they have questions answer them, if they have concerns help them to understand that what is going on with their growth is helping them to grow into a divine woman.
We have it back wards in America. Our right of passage of teens is to send them off to the mall. It’s a form of Independence to be able to wonder the mall for hours on end with other teens. Our teens are bombarded with so much information, and so much stimuli. Our teens are so impressionable at this time in their lives so why the hell are we allowing them to be subjected to so much crap, excuse my french. If you lived in a tribe, once you grow into your teens you are sent on a vision quest. This is a time of quiet, of solitude, it is a girl or boys time to discover themselves and grow into a real man or woman. It is understood that a teen is going through so much emotionally and physically, lets not forget hormonally and the vision quest is mean to guide them through all of this internal resistance.
We don’t live in small tribes here, it’s not common to send out kids on vision quests and celebrate right of passage, but as parents we can create this for them. My husband and I are going to create something that works for our girls and our son, we as parents will give them a chance to have a right of passage and a vision quest, even if it is in the center of a modern country.
This can be fun and a bonding experience for all of you. Try doing some research, their are other people in the US who are doing this for their kids too. Check out and get some ideas so you can do this for your growing children.